2012 Goals Update

I thought mid-way through the year would be a good time to reflect back on my goals for 2012.

Continue to eliminate clutter from our lives and improve our financial security.

I need to do another purge/donation soon. I have done a good job though of sticking to my goal of being a mindful consumer. Could’ve spent a little less on the boys birthday parties but over time I’ll learn I guess. Our savings took a hit in May from a number of unexpected expenses but I do have a job for now so we shouldn’t have too much trouble building that account back up.

Continue to find meaningful ways to give back to my community.

Big check here. I have been involved with my usual volunteer positions. I have also been working on several writing projects (letters to the editor for the local paper and a feature story on a development issue for a local alternative magazine). 

Immerse myself in my thesis research and give it my all.

Although I haven’t focused enough of my efforts on this goal, I have decided to focus my research so that a component will benefit the community where I live. It is my hope that this will also help me to find work closer to home somewhere down the line.

Cherish the little things.

Well… I haven’t written in my daily journal since the end of March so not sure that is working for me anymore. Maybe I will try something else like generating discussion at the dinner table on the best parts of everyone’s day. B started t-ball last night and I had a surreal moment watching him immersed in the game. I am so proud of him and so happy he found something he really likes.

Act on the fact that "life is short".

I have been doing pretty well in this area. I decided (somewhat hastily) to visit my best friend in Edmonton in May when I was surprised with a decent tax return. I have also been taking advantage of most opportunities that come my way – conferences, speakers, meeting with friends, etc. and I am finding the more opportunities I take advantage of, the more opportunities that come my way. 

Edmonton Trip

N and I are back from our 5 day trip to Edmonton. Our trip was pretty laid back since we had to stick with N's naps and meal routines. Edmonton is truly a beautiful city. I'm definitely a fan of dry climates and the weather was just right - between 12-20 degrees.

Some highlights: seeing the spectacle that is West Edmonton Mall, shopping at outlets for some new work attire (I got a job and start at the end of the month!), checking out the downtown Farmer's Market, picnicking at a downtown park with my dear friend and host, and meeting up with another bloggy mom and her 3 sweet lads for a park play date.

I brought B back this really awesome Melissa and Doug Canada puzzle. It is large and only 48 pieces. It has so much information on it yet is easy enough for a 4 year old to do. It also enabled me to show him where we travelled to. I also found these really sweet hand crafted wooden name puzzles at the Farmer's Market which was perfect because A. places never carry the name Brendan; and B. he needs to know how to recognize and write his name for kindergarten this Fall.

On the move

My littlest is not yet walking, though his brother was a later walker too. He is however standing on his own when holding onto things in his hands. It is like he doesn't realize he is doing it and when he does he sits down or reaches to something for support. He is definitely on the move though.

Baby N and I are visiting a dear friend in Edmonton, Alberta for the weekend. The flight was challenging yesterday morning but we're having a wonderful time thus far. We're here until Monday!

The past couple of weeks have been..

Busy. Hence the absence.

B turned 4 last Monday and my baby N turns one tomorrow. Where does the time go?

We had about four different celebrations with different groups of family and friends. We've also been very busy attending other birthday parties. I can't imagine what our schedule will look like once N starts getting invited to parties too. R and I might have to split up to take each boy to a different party.

On top of all of this I started an intensive 2-week course last Wednesday (the last actual course of my Masters degree - the rest of my credits will be independent studies and my own research). But for now, I'm making the one hour commute each way into Toronto by train every day.

Friendly parks - the exception to the rule

I've been very lucky with the parks in our neighbourhood. At our last house, we took B to the park often (where the photo above was taken). At this park a bunch of moms/grandparents/daycare providers brought their children on the regular. We could count on seeing the same few groups of kids and guardians. Quickly we learned to bring snacks, chalk, toys, and sand toys to the park. The environment here was very welcoming. People shared toys and snacks and adults conversed while the children played. When we moved last summer, we were sad to leave that park but quite happy to find that our new park is much the same. Not unlike our old park, there are a variety of care providers and children of different ages at the park. But in our new neighbourhood, the school bus picks up and drops off children at the park. Often we see the same children spending time at the park after school before heading home for dinner. Unfortunately my park going experience seems to be the exception rather than the rule from what I hear from other moms.

Fellow mom blogger Mo from Not a Coupon Queen wrote a wonderfully authentic guest post over at Oshawa Mom Space on her negative experience and park etiquette. Check it out and weigh in!

Homemade Pizza and Allergies

It has been so long since we made pizza from scratch. Part of the reason has been the insanity of having a family with two little ones. The other part of the reason has been that up until about Christmas time, I was steering clear of gluten and many other foods due to extreme eczema.

I have since seemed to have sorted out my allergy issues and now have a much more manageable list of avoids (pineapple, nuts, dairy). Turns out I was under extreme stress and was allergic to our older house. I have very strong environmental allergies – dust, mold, pollen, trees, etc. Our older neighbourhood had mature trees in many varieties and colourful and nice smelling gardens abound. Our basement was quite damp as most are in 80+ year old homes. We had also been under construction in the house for about 3 years, which led to increased dust. I also suspect that the off gassing of all the new materials didn’t help the cause. Needless to say, our new house is close is about 10 years old and since it is in a newer neighbourhood, comes with far less mature trees/beautiful gardens. Sad for the eyes but I’m feeling much better and back to eating pizza (with the minor adjustments of no pineapple and goat mozzarella as a substitute for the dairy). 

My creative side is lacking a bit these days as far as food goes so I turned to the website of my favourite pizza place in Peterborough from my university days for inspiration. I find MYO pizza an awesome way to get the little ones to eat more veggies. 

Committing to maintaining relationships.

Being in school and having various volunteer commitments makes me sometimes rather busy. R also works a lot of overtime, taking it when he can get it since it is never a sure thing. Often my activities take place in the evenings. This means that R and I do a trade off with the kids. Some days we see very little of eachother.  It can be hard with our busyish lifestyle to stop and consciously make time to do things all together as a family but it is something that I think is so so important. Same goes for the other important relationships. Couple time is also important since our marriage is the foundation of our family. Although I do think that the family should always be a first priority. Friends are also invaluable and it is incredibly important to make time and nurture these relationships as they can fade to a degree when put on the back burner.

I’ve been trying to put in place some measures to ensure that I am making a commitment to maintain ALL, not just some of the relationships in my life. I think a lot of onus is on the woman in the household to “keep the family together”. Not saying it is warranted… but the pressure is still there none-the-less. Here is what has been working for me.

Family

This past weekend we went out for an hour around the block. B on his battery powered ATV (a kijiji find!), me on my rollerblades, R on the bike and N in tow in the bicycle trailer. It was good fun. At least once on a weekend we try to do something all together. We also make an effort to be home more nights/week than out. This means no more than 3 nights out in a week (cumulatively for everyone). I think I will keep this balance in mind when the boys get a little older and want to do activities in the evenings. This may mean that as our family gets busier I will have to cut back personally on my evening commitments. I am okay with this.  

Wife

At least one night/week R and I try to watch a movie after the kids go to bed (sometimes we have to cut it short since we tend to get tired). We also text throughout the day and hug and kiss hello and goodbye. Once a month, we try to get out for a date night.

Friend

I love my friends. God forbid something were to happen to my family, I know I would still have a family of friends. One of my very best friends lives in Edmonton now. I try to skype with her or call her once every week or two. One of my other best friends has kids and so we try to get together for play dates to catch up. I also enjoy getting out with my other kidless friends for a nice dinner or to go to an event. Recently I went to dinner in Toronto with 2 of my good girlfriends from university. It is sometimes nice to not always be talking about the kids (since they don’t have any to talk about) and to do adult things. I try to get out with friends sans kiddos at least once/month. I also love Facebook since I can keep updated and in communication with friends that I don’t get to see as often.

What do others do to maintain the important relationships in their life?