While I have been having so much fun with Brendan staying home and watching him grow in leaps and bounds, I have still felt as though something has been missing...
At many points during my time as a stay at home mom I have felt an extreme loss of independence. Before Brendan came along I relished my time alone and loved keeping active and busy in a number of ways through my coursework, volunteering, etc. When Brendan was born I did what every mother does naturally and put life aside and took on my role as a mother 110% in that transition I lost a lot of what really made me independent and happy. When I was working on my undergraduate thesis I felt that independence come back. When I was working full-time last summer a small part of my "independence void" was filled but my "nurturing mother void" prevailed and I couldn't fathom working full-time and being a part-time mom.
Over the past few weeks I have realized that I really want to go back to school. I had always planned on going back to do a Masters but just didn't know when. As Brendan is learning new things everyday (see evidence below) my own personal growth and breadth of knowledge has been waning. I'm certain the answer to my fulfillment is to jump back into academia. This new endeavor will allow me to be more of a full-time mom and part-time student. I think this is my perfect balance. I have been working hard on my application for the Fall and hoping and praying that all the pieces fall into place. As for our baby plans... they are still in place even though I have decided to pursue this large venture. After much thought I felt that I didn't want to not take advantage of the opportunity to go back to school while I am in the right mindset. When I get pregnant I'll work out the details then but for now..here I go! Oh...and I officially start sewing classes this month - YAY!
Learning how to walk the dog and LOVING it!